The Chunder Bowl

hatever, for me it was a revelation.

What a great idea, though – and why don’t we have such things over here? For a start the concept of transforming the chunder into, if not an acceptable part of an evening’s drinking, at least not a disaster, is revolutionary. [I must stress here that my chundering days are well in the past: the beginning of wisdom is surely when you realise that although three pints / glasses of wine / shots of whisky make you feel great, it doesn’t follow that six will make you feel twice as great.] Normally, given that throwing up is such an unpleasant business, you deny for as long as possible the inevitability of a chunder, and then make a mad dash for the toilet when it’s already too late……the room’s spinning…you feel terrible… “you okay man, you’re white as a sheet”…”I think I’m going to be”…BLOOOAAARRGGH. Even if you’re sensible and stagger through to the Gents in time, where do you go? In a cubicle all you can do is kneel down in front of the toilet, clutch the side of the bowl, and heave. On a Saturday night – well, on any night – especially with the modern tendency for men to use a cubicle to piss rather than a urinal (why is that?…increased modesty?) and given the notorious inaccuracy of men on such occasions, this is a situation you really want to avoid if at all possible. The urinal? On the floor? Not nice.

I believe there’s a business opportunity here. The Chunder Bowl. The only innovation I would make to the magnificent object I saw in Westphalia would be the addition of handles at either side for gripping. I present this as a suggestion to anyone with entrepreneurial flair. If someone does run with it, I hope they’ll remember where they first heard the idea, and at least buy me a few drinks…but, you know, not too many.