ti, who lives in southern Helmand province, had married another man to whom she had been betrothed since they were both children. Once the parents had agreed on the match and the terms, the deal was almost impossible to break, even after her fiancé was seriously injured in an accident.
Her father died when she was young, and her widowed mother did not have the means to resist pressure to honor the contract.
Gulghoti duly married her disabled fiancé when she was 19, but he died after a year, leaving her a widow.
According to custom in this predominantly Pashtun region, once a woman marries, she remains more or less the property of her husband’s family. If she is widowed, she will commonly be married off to a relative of her deceased husband.
“I had to obey these rules, and marry my husband’s younger brother,” said Gulghoti.
This happened despite the fact that Hekmat was only three at the time.
“They forced me to marry this baby,” she said. “By the time he reaches adolescence, I will be an old woman.”
Hekmat does not understand that the woman who bathes him, looks after him, and prepares his meals is actually his wife. He calls her khala – “auntie.” He is small and shy, and shrinks away from strangers. He does not attend school – no one in his family is literate.
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